March 7, 2018

Goodbye to All That: The Michmondo Version

I recently finished reading “Goodbye to All That“, a book of short stories written by women who loved and left New York City.

Some of the stories had happy endings elsewhere, while others realized that New York will always be home.

After ~8 years living in NYC, I’m confident my story belongs in the “happy endings elsewhere” file.

Pre-New York

Before attending NYU, I grew up in the suburbs of Houston. I visited NYC a handful of times for family vacations. Like a lot of teens in the ’90s, I loved watching Friends and deliriously thought that every 20-something New Yorker lived in fabulous Manhattan apartments like Monica Geller’s.

Even after 9/11 happened, the threat of terrorism didn’t scare me away. When it was time to apply to colleges, I chose NYU as one of my “reach” schools.

The realistic optimist in me always thought I’d end up at the University of Texas at Austin. I was already accepted. (At the time, they automatically accepted students if they placed in the top 10% of their high school class.) It’d give me the opportunity to move away from home, but not be too far from it.

So you can only imagine my surprise when I saw a thick envelope from New York University sitting in my mailbox.

Reading the acceptance letter and sifting through all the welcome material was surreal. I was good enough to attend NYU? I actually have an opportunity to LIVE in the heart of NYC?!

I convinced my parents to book a trip to New York to do a school tour. Afterwards, I was hooked. I ended up accepting and moved to the city in the fall of 2003.

NYU in a nutshell

I’m not gonna lie – my four years at NYU exceeded my expectations. I have fond memories of perfect days in the city and parties that I had way too much fun at. I still have two groups of friends that I remain close with, more than a decade after graduation.

I never thought of transferring out, nor could I imagine myself at any other school.

Leaving New York the first time

After graduation, I left New York for practical purposes – I didn’t have a job, and I didn’t feel like searching for one during my last semester.

I became a “boomerang baby” and moved back in with my parents, where I started my career at a wealth management firm in a small suburban town.

Then, love happened, and New York called me back.

Surviving the concrete jungle

I wouldn’t say I was wise back then (I was only in my early 20’s!) but I returned knowing that working in New York wouldn’t be the same as being a student in New York.

Looking back, I’m amazed at how I stayed afloat. My salary wasn’t so great, and the combination of being triple taxed + my 10% 401(k) contribution + high rent really didn’t leave me with much disposable income.

But, having a good group of friends and being around my boyfriend (now husband) made it all worth it. Also, alcohol. All of the alcohol helped.

Moving to a life of SIN

When my fiancé told me he accepted a full-time position in Singapore, I was kind of in denial. I knew NYC wouldn’t be my forever home, but I never imagined I would leave it for a foreign country that I didn’t know much about.

Would I end up liking it more than New York?

Hindsight is 20/20

The answer is yes and no.

While a lot of lifestyle aspects left much to be desired in Singapore, I will say that Singapore was a better move for me professionally.

I never realized how toxic my work environment was in New York. There were too many bitter people who felt entitled to things, and enough instances of subtle sexism.

In Singapore, I found my passion. I had a job where I actually looked forward to going to work.

I made some wonderful friends along the way. I did a lot of traveling.

The low taxes made me realize how much I wasn’t making in New York.

Singapore’s subway system showed me how efficient, clean, and affordable public transportation can be, and what happens when the money from price increases are actually used to improve the overall system. (Don’t get me started on how corrupt the MTA is in New York.)

While things like alcohol and good western food were expensive, rents weren’t so bad and the apartment buildings were well-maintained.

Overall, I had a comfortable and better life on that little red dot.

I could’ve started a new life chapter and given birth in Singapore, but fate changed the location to Hong Kong.

Home Kong

While raising a kid in Hong Kong has it’s own challenges, I am grateful for starting my parenting journey here.

We’re able to afford the help that we need so both my husband and I can have careers. The public healthcare system works. It’s nice to know our son has affordable options to get the care he needs.

We also know Hong Kong will not be our forever home. But the more we think about it, Hong Kong has given us better opportunities than New York ever could.